Forgiveness is Forgetting

Janice Brown

By Janice Brown,

Practicing law can be tough.

Causes us to question our intellect, our self-esteem, our choices, our bosses’ sanity. At least for me, it did. 

Then we leave that toxic environment and bring all of that baggage to the next job, to our homes and to our friends.  Even though we have not suffered the slings and arrows in the new place, or from our family or our friends, we buff up and swear that ‘they’ aren’t going to do it to us again. But, as written by Marianne Williamson, we create what we defend against. Our leftover fear is not that pleasant for anyone, including yourself. 

I have a number of friends who say, I forgive, but I don’t forget. What does that really mean? In my view, it means, that we really have not forgiven, because alas the Who “we won’t be fooled again!”   Well, I understand the sentiment, but that really feels to me that we are giving a piece of our power and our joy to someone that doesn’t deserve it.   Further, true forgiveness is divine and nothing divine leads you astray. 

As India Arie sings, “I have been trying to get down to the heart of the matter. But my will gets weak and my thoughts seem to scatter; but I think it is about forgiveness, forgiveness. Even if, even if, you don’t love me anymore.”